noun
a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome.
Anxiety is exhausting. It wears me out. It feels like my brain is constantly firing off thoughts with no rhyme or reason. It is always thinking, and often times, {most of the time} it feels like it can't stop. It can feel like the thoughts are sometimes irrational, things that I can't control and that I know I shouldn't be worrying about- but the thing is, I can't stop worrying. Telling myself to not worry, or not to worry about things I can control, makes it worse, because then I am worried about being worried.
Sometimes it keeps me awake at nights. I wake up feeling exhausted, if I slept. It doesn't matter how tired I am, my brain wont shut off. {I did some research and recently bought a weighted blanket to try to help with this- I will write about this later}. Sometimes, I don't even know what it is that is keeping me awake. I often ask, "Why can't I sleep?" Even sleep aids don't seem to help.
I drive the people around me crazy, even if they say I don't. I worry about things that I have no need to worry about. I need (sometimes constant) reassurance that things are going to be ok. I may seem like I am an outgoing, bubbly person, and yes this is sometimes true, but sometimes, I just need to have some quiet time, home, away from the crowds. Sometimes the thought of being around people, even people I love and care deeply about, can be exhausting. Telling myself to stop thinking these thoughts, or to stop worrying about it, makes it even worse, because then I am worrying about worrying. It never stops.
It has been said that anxiety feels like you are swimming up stream. Your thoughts are the water rushing by you and you are just trying to get passed them. You just want to make it to somewhere you can stand up and not have the water take you away.
I make list. Some would even say I make list about making list. But somehow writing everything down and being able to check it off, helps. I feel a sense of accomplishment by being able to check things off my lists. It is a way that I am able to organize the thoughts in my head. I can see what needs to be done, I can cross it off, I can visually get it done.
A day off? I feel bad when I take days to do nothing. I feel like I wasted an opportunity to do something or get something done. Once I have something in my head that needs to be done, or I want to get done, which makes the anxiety worse. So yes, I like to be busy, yes I do take time to do fun things, and somehow find a way to keep the balance.
Living with anxiety is a balancing act. Finding what works for you can help. It might not always work. There are times when I just can't deal. I break down, but the best thing you can do when you are down, is get back up.
Sometimes it keeps me awake at nights. I wake up feeling exhausted, if I slept. It doesn't matter how tired I am, my brain wont shut off. {I did some research and recently bought a weighted blanket to try to help with this- I will write about this later}. Sometimes, I don't even know what it is that is keeping me awake. I often ask, "Why can't I sleep?" Even sleep aids don't seem to help.
I drive the people around me crazy, even if they say I don't. I worry about things that I have no need to worry about. I need (sometimes constant) reassurance that things are going to be ok. I may seem like I am an outgoing, bubbly person, and yes this is sometimes true, but sometimes, I just need to have some quiet time, home, away from the crowds. Sometimes the thought of being around people, even people I love and care deeply about, can be exhausting. Telling myself to stop thinking these thoughts, or to stop worrying about it, makes it even worse, because then I am worrying about worrying. It never stops.
It has been said that anxiety feels like you are swimming up stream. Your thoughts are the water rushing by you and you are just trying to get passed them. You just want to make it to somewhere you can stand up and not have the water take you away.
I make list. Some would even say I make list about making list. But somehow writing everything down and being able to check it off, helps. I feel a sense of accomplishment by being able to check things off my lists. It is a way that I am able to organize the thoughts in my head. I can see what needs to be done, I can cross it off, I can visually get it done.
A day off? I feel bad when I take days to do nothing. I feel like I wasted an opportunity to do something or get something done. Once I have something in my head that needs to be done, or I want to get done, which makes the anxiety worse. So yes, I like to be busy, yes I do take time to do fun things, and somehow find a way to keep the balance.
Living with anxiety is a balancing act. Finding what works for you can help. It might not always work. There are times when I just can't deal. I break down, but the best thing you can do when you are down, is get back up.
