1. My body isn't perfect.
In fact I would say its far from it. I have loose skin and rolls. I have childhood scars from falling off my bike or that one on my knee when I was at my Godmothers house and landed on one of those Nurf Gun toys with the spikes. And then there are my scars from surgery. They go from my elbow to my armpits. But those scars, I like those scars. The remind me of where I was and how far I have come. They keep me going and keep me from throwing in the towel.
2. I don't walk with confidence.
OMG especially in heels. I have no grace in them whatsoever. But in all seriousness, this used to be true. I would say that I would walk with my head down. I avoided eye contact. If I couldn't see you, you couldn't see me right? I am working hard at this. Being proud of who I am. It's something I continue to work on.
3. I get into fights with my parents and friends.
Oh my do I ever. I am strong willed, stubborn and opinionated. I will stand up for what I believe in. I will fight for what I want and what is right, but I have also learned that not every fight is a fights that I'm willing to "die on the battle field for" sometimes I need to just let it go, which is easier said than done.
4. Some nights I'd rather be by myself than out partying.
Isn't this the truth. I very much enjoy quiet evenings, to myself, alone in my room watching Netflix, reading a book or working on a craft. My daily life can be loud and busy and sometimes I just need to come home to a quiet space.
5. I cry over the smallest things sometimes.
Yes. I am an emotional person. I wear my heart on my sleeve and things that shouldn't bother me do.
6. There are days that I get through with forced smiles and fake laughs.
There are days I would rather dig my eye out with a spoon instead of doing what I'm doing. Meetings that could have happened over an email, or meetings that don't have structure and conflict with my type A personality. Or now, when I know that I have put weight back on and continue to struggle to take it off again.
7. Sometimes I try to convince myself that things are okay when they're not.
Or vice versa. Things are ok and I am convinced they are not.
8. I'm not ugly but I'm not beautiful.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Healthy knows no size. Healthy is beautiful.
9. I don't look as good in real life as I do in pictures.
I've learned (thank you A) how to pose in pictures to make myself appear thinner. And pictures I don't like... I get rid of... ;)
10. There are some nights that I cry myself to sleep.
I'm not where I thought I would be at this point in my life and when I have to much time to think, I get down. I try to stay constantly busy and not have down time, but there are some nights I wish things were different and I wonder what is going to happen next. I am happy with my jobs, my family and my friends. I wouldn't change what I'm doing and where I am at. I know it's part of the plan, but sometimes I just wonder- what is next?
11. I constantly think I'm not good enough.
All the time. I am always thinking I could be better, do more. I didn't try hard enough. There is always doubt and even though I have been told that "I am a star" {Reiki}, sometimes it's hard to believe it.
12. I'm imperfect, but I'm perfectly me.
'I'm not a perfect girl , my hair doesn't always stay in place. I spill a lot of things and I am pretty clumsy! But when I think about it & take a step back, I remember how amazing my life truly is & that maybe... I like being Imperfect"
